What We Fight For

I still remember the first time one of my friends told me she was on birth control. We were 16 and at sleepaway camp. I don’t remember why she told me; maybe I saw her taking one and asked. I was aghast at her response. 16 and taking birth control? “Are you having sex?” I didn’t quite whisper. Her face turned red and she quickly shook her head. “No, it’s my period. To regulate it.” She explained that she had a heavy flow and how painful it was so her doctor put her on ‘the pill.’ “It regulates your hormones, I don’t know about all that other stuff. I’m definitely not having sex.”

That was my first real life experience with birth control. I’d heard of it, in movies, books, and TV it had been mentioned all in connotation with sex. (My sex and body education came from popular culture because my mother wpuld let us watch TV but not explain to my sisters and I what we were going through every month). In the super religious community I grew up in, birth control was brought up only in connection with people who were newly married and usually said in a judgmental tone.

This is the narrative the media wants us to have. Birth control is a shameful thing. Women who take birth control are shamed. Because having sex is a shameful thing, unless of course a man wants to have sex and then everyone’s like “You go, dude!” And if it results in unwanted pregnancy, that shame directed towards the woman is multiplied by a number with a lot of zeroes after it. The mentality comes from men claiming women don’t know how to take care of themselves. Women are breeders but only when it’s in the “right way.” And their bodies are there solely for men to enjoy but for women to enjoy it themselves is A. Very. Bad. Thing. that must be punished. "You painted a naked woman because you enjoyed looking at her, you put a mirror in her hand and called it Vanity, thus morally condemning the woman whose nakedness you had depicted for your own pleasure." (Berger, 51)

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And this sexuality which belongs to men, putting women in sexy roles, is reminded of at every corner. “Sexuality for women has been the least explored topic in our culture...emphasis on female pleasure is lacking and long overdue. In Hollywood, displaying women’s breasts or putting a woman’s body on display is code for “this is sexuality.” This sexuality belongs to men.” (Steele, 1, 2) On the press junket for The Avengers, Scarlett Johansson gets asked remarkably inappropriate questions regarding her costume and diet.

What it is always reiterating is that a woman’s body is not private. It does not belong to her own self. This is what the media keeps insisting. Whether it be entertainment or politics, a woman is there only to live her life according to men. And this goes beyond sexuality and into personal choices such as birth control. Women are denied over and over their own agency, to make decision and take care of themselves. We trust women to give birth and raise children but not to ensure their own health and safety? That they be judged and scrutinized is appalling.

“A woman should always have the right to choose what she does with her body. Is is frustrating that this needs to be said repeatedly. On the scale of relevance, public approval or disapproval of a woman’s choice should not merit measure.” (Gay, 273)

But then in strolls the birth control debate. In 2012, there was a nearly all-male panel for a birth control hearing in front of congress. Continuously, it is men who are in charge of how women take care of themselves. It seems that the men there were members of clergy, and somehow no women of clergy were available.

And this brings in religion, religion which is used to dominate women and keep them down, pushing their sexuality to a minimum. And in 2012, this is somehow accepted behavior. Thanks to Hobby Lobby and their inability to want to help their female employees medically, women who work for religious organizations can be denied birth control. And that is beyond reprehensible simply because the idea of birth control being used for sex, and sex only, so scares a male population that they would would claim it affects their religious freedom. You’re using the first amendment wrong, religion.

“The bottom line: our health care decision are not our bosses’ decision - and neither is our use of birth control, for any reason. That we even need to argue this point is incredible, but politicians, corporations, and the Court need to hear from women. (Richards, Time)

What media constantly does is drive these narratives. When women explain the truth of what birth control or Planned Parenthood can be used for, other than (clutch your pearls now) abortions, they are automatically labeled sluts and liars. The demonization of women who are there to help women comes out in full force, sadly sometimes driven by women.

There’s only one thing we can do: We have to, as always, keep the conversation going. Keep talking, keep fighting (with logic and words), keep proving the need for women to gain agency, and take back our bodies for ourselves. It’s terrible that in 2015 we are still fighting, literally for our lives. But the alternative is so much worse.

Works Cited
1) Steele, Tanya. "'Hobby Lobby,' and a Woman's Right to Sexual Exploration."RH Reality Check. N.p., 10 July 2014. Web.
2) Berger, John. Ways of Seeing. London: British Broadcasting, 1973. Print. 51
3) Gay, Roxane. Bad Feminist: Essays. New York: Harper Perennial, 2014. Print. 273
4) Richards, Cecile. "The Only Controversy About Birth Control Is That We're Still Fighting for It." Time. Time, Web